A Simple Evening Protocol for Nervous System Regulation

This five-minute nightly practice supports sleep, focus, and nervous system resilience.

Most people end the day replaying what went wrong only to have their nervous system pay the price. I recommend a simple nightly ritual to shift your brain out of stress and into agency.

Here’s how it works: 

Pair psychologist Martin Seligman’s  “What Went Well” practice with the future-focused refinement from top executive coach, Dan Sullivan. 

By listing three things that went well, you close the day with accuracy instead of endlessly ruminating about what went wrong. Then you choose three wins you expect tomorrow to lift agency, and give your nervous system a clear plan to follow when the lights come on.

Why this combo works

• You counter the negativity bias before bed, which can ease sleep onset.
• You attribute causes, which builds agency rather than luck or blame.
• You pre-load tomorrow’s attention so your first hour has direction, not drift.

The 5-step ritual (5 minutes, every evening)

1. Set an anchor
   Choose one cue you never miss: face wash, tea, or plugging in your phone. Keep a notebook on the nightstand, or use Notes in airplane mode.
2. Name three things that went well
   Small counts. Specific beats grand. “Protein at breakfast,” “Walked between calls,” “Texted appreciation.”
3. Write why each one went well
   One sentence for the cause. Preparation, a boundary you kept, someone’s help, plain good timing. The “why” is the engine.
4. Savor one win for 20 seconds
   Close your eyes. Replay a detail. Feel the breath lengthen. Savoring turns a fact into a resource.
5. Add Dan Sullivan’s refinement: choose tomorrow’s three wins
   Write three things you expect will go well. For each, add a start time and first move. Keep them winnable. Examples:

• “Protein at first meal. Start 8:00 a.m. First move: set eggs on the counter tonight.”
• “Two focus bouts. Start 9:00 a.m. First move: calendar blocks live and phone in the drawer.”
• “Lights out at 10:15 p.m. First move: alarm set for 9:40 wind-down.”

Make it yours

• Pressed for time: One win and one tomorrow-win.
• Restless mind: Voice-note the list, then jot it in the morning.
• Skeptical: Try seven nights. Check how long it takes to fall asleep and how purposeful your first hour feels.

What to track (choose one)

• Sleep: time to fall asleep and rested-on-waking
• Nervous system: the ease of “calm on command” with longer exhales
• Behavior: days you repeat one helpful action like morning light, protein, or a 20-minute lift

Troubleshooting

• “I cannot find three.” Start with one. Make it microscopic. “Stood up between calls.”
• “Feels cheesy.” Drop praise language. Write plain facts.
• “I forget.” Pair it with a cue you already keep, like charging your phone.

Your nervous system doesn’t reset because you tell it to relax. It resets when it receives evidence of safety, competence, and predictability. 

Done consistently, you’re not just improving sleep. You’re training your brain to close stress loops, reduce cognitive load, and wake with a plan instead of a spike of cortisol. Five minutes is enough because the signal is precise. You don’t need to do this perfectly, you just need to start. Give it a try tonight.